My name is Mark Goodfield. Welcome to The Blunt Bean Counter ™, a blog that shares my thoughts on income taxes, finance and the psychology of money. I am a Chartered Professional Accountant and a partner with a National Accounting Firm in Toronto. This blog is meant for everyone, but in particular for high net worth individuals and owners of private corporations. The views and opinions expressed in this blog are written solely in my personal capacity and cannot be attributed to the accounting firm with which I am affiliated. My posts are blunt, opinionated and even have a twist of humor/sarcasm. You've been warned. Please note the blog posts are time sensitive and subject to changes in legislation or law.

Monday, September 3, 2018

The Best of The Blunt Bean Counter - Are Accountants Really Boring?

This summer I am posting the "best of" The Blunt Bean Counter blog while I work on my golf game. Today, I am re-posting a June 2012 post titled "Are Accountants Really Boring". That is a rhetorical question, please don't provide the answer. My psyche could not take the expected responses :)

I enjoyed writing this post as it was whimsical with some "attempted" humour. I have taken the liberty to play around with the original a bit by adding a couple updates. I hope you find this slightly amusing.

Are Accountants Really Boring


The joke goes like this. "When does a person decide to become an accountant?" Drum roll please. The answer…"When they realize that they do not have the charisma to become an undertaker." Or how about this one? Question: "What does an accountant use for birth control?" Answer: "Their personality."

With a reputation like that, Flo Rida will not be penning any rap songs called Wild One’s featuring accountants. So, are we accountants that boring or do we take an unfair rap?

Unfortunately, in general, I think the rap is probably warranted, although perception may be reality. How would us CPA’s be viewed if there had been a TV show called LA Accountant, instead of LA Law? Did you know John Grisham got his undergraduate degree in accounting? What if his books had been about accounting firms instead of law firms? Accountants would then be looked upon as cool dudes/dudettes with a conservative bent.

In 2016, we finally got top billing with the release of the Ben Affleck's movie titled, "The Accountant". Prior to seeing the movie, I was so excited. A movie about accountants, starring a good looking well known actor; finally, the world was going to see how cool accountants could be. Boy was I surprised when I found out that Ben's role in the movie was that of a freelance accountant for dangerous criminal organizations who is a stone-cold killer. However, upon reflection, maybe his role will give accountants a bit of a bad boy image and cause anyone to think twice before criticizing their accountant :)

Is it nature, or nurture? I think probably a combination of both. Many accountants by nature are cautious and conservative. Years of training to refine these character traits amplify the situation in non-professional environments. It would probably help if our dress style did not include pens hanging from our dress shirts, pencils behind our ears, or if we occasionally loosened our ties both literally and figuratively. I always had this underlying desire at a cocktail party full of accountants to run about the room and loosen all their ties.

Personally, although I have pride in my profession and my job, I know the boring stereotype precedes me and I try not to advertise the fact that I am a CPA upon initially meeting people. You can only have so many people at parties walk away after you tell them you are an accountant before you get a complex.

Classic Bean Counter
Unlike many accountants, I don’t advertise my profession with a vanity licence plate with the initials MG CPA. Although I am considering getting one saying “The BBC” [The Blunt Bean Counter]), but I am concerned everyone will just think I am just a British public television expatriate.

When I am outed as an accountant, I say I am a wealth advisor who will maximize your net worth and minimize your taxes, to make my job sound sexier. Although my naturally boring nature often gives me away, many of my other characteristics are non-accountant like and I enjoy surprising people when they find out this blunt, sometimes arrogant, sometimes confrontational and very occasionally humorous person is an accountant. My happiest social outings are not when a good-looking girl stares at me, but when someone says, “Wow, I would never have thought you to be an accountant”.

So, are any of my kind not boring? I did a search of famous accountants and came up with this list. For those of you old enough to remember the Bob Newhart Show, Bob Newhart the namesake and star was a former accountant. Now I am not sure Bob helps our cause. He was funny, but in a boring deadpan style, certainly was not stylish and definitely was no Chris Rock. 

To my surprise I found a musician who started life as an accountant. You figure any musician would break the stereotype as they lead crazy drug induced lifestyles. I found out Kenny G, a great saxophone player, is our exception. However, although Kenny is a great musician, I typically hear his music in my dentist's office and as far as I know, he did not have a Playboy Playmate as a girlfriend like so many rock stars.

In 2018 our athletic image got a boost when Scott Foster, an accountant by day became the Chicago Black Hawks emergency goaltender for one night. This story is detailed in this article.

I was about to give up hope that I could find an accountant who was not boring when a beacon of light shone and led me to Paul Beeston. Finally, an accountant with attitude! Beeston, who was a CPA with Coopers and Lybrand, was also the President and CEO of the Toronto Blue Jays and later the President and COO of Major League Baseball. Paul is a cigar chomping, fun loving, non-sock wearing CPA. Yes, there is one out there.

There you have it, proof that there is an accountant out there who does not fit the stereotype. Anyways, if you ever meet me, I will be easy to spot. I am the outgoing accountant who will be looking down at your shoes instead of staring down at my own shoes :).

This site provides general information on various tax issues and other matters. The information is not intended to constitute professional advice and may not be appropriate for a specific individual or fact situation. It is written by the author solely in their personal capacity and cannot be attributed to the accounting firm with which they are affiliated. It is not intended to constitute professional advice, and neither the author nor the firm with which the author is associated shall accept any liability in respect of any reliance on the information contained herein. Readers should always consult with their professional advisors in respect of their particular situation. Please note the blog post is time sensitive and subject to changes in legislation or law.

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