Today is my 25th wedding anniversary. In this day and age, 25 years of marriage is considered quite an accomplishment. I think that both my wife and I never expected anything other than to celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary together; a philosophy that has enabled us to accept and overcome the various challenges along the way.
People (mostly guys it seems); always joke about being married to the same person for so long. However, as an accountant I have observed not only the financial mess left behind by a broken marriage, but the emotional debris. You have to consider yourself very lucky to find a kindred spirit to share your life with.
We all try to figure out what type of person is the right fit for us as a “life partner” prior to getting married, but who the heck really knows if your interests and personalities will truly stay aligned after 25 years. In my case, other than my wife’s less than enthusiastic love of golf and my desire to avoid superfluous social outings which she finds enjoyable, we are very much aligned.
My wife tells me I have only breached one unstated condition of our marriage, that being I have gone from being timely, to slightly late (I tell her that is because I was tired of being timely and often waiting for others). I consider that breach an equalizer to the fact I thought she had a great wardrobe when we got married; when in fact, she had often borrowed her nice clothes from her mother and we had a large unexpected clothing expenditure soon after being married.
So my advice after 25 years, not that you asked? Ensure that from day one you make time for you and your spouse. The second week after our son was born, my in-laws came over and said to my wife and I, “go out for dinner, we will look after your son”. Their message – always make time for you and your spouse, or life and/or your children will consume you both.
To my lovely wife (actually, too good looking for me as I have been told by others), I love you and look forward to achieving our bucket list of items together over the next 25 years.
People (mostly guys it seems); always joke about being married to the same person for so long. However, as an accountant I have observed not only the financial mess left behind by a broken marriage, but the emotional debris. You have to consider yourself very lucky to find a kindred spirit to share your life with.
We all try to figure out what type of person is the right fit for us as a “life partner” prior to getting married, but who the heck really knows if your interests and personalities will truly stay aligned after 25 years. In my case, other than my wife’s less than enthusiastic love of golf and my desire to avoid superfluous social outings which she finds enjoyable, we are very much aligned.
My wife tells me I have only breached one unstated condition of our marriage, that being I have gone from being timely, to slightly late (I tell her that is because I was tired of being timely and often waiting for others). I consider that breach an equalizer to the fact I thought she had a great wardrobe when we got married; when in fact, she had often borrowed her nice clothes from her mother and we had a large unexpected clothing expenditure soon after being married.
So my advice after 25 years, not that you asked? Ensure that from day one you make time for you and your spouse. The second week after our son was born, my in-laws came over and said to my wife and I, “go out for dinner, we will look after your son”. Their message – always make time for you and your spouse, or life and/or your children will consume you both.
To my lovely wife (actually, too good looking for me as I have been told by others), I love you and look forward to achieving our bucket list of items together over the next 25 years.
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I just came across your blog and enjoy reading it, as a staff accountant who will be writing the UFE in September (and going on nine years of marriage). Congratulations to you and your wife; the quarter century mark is a great accomplishment!
ReplyDeleteHi Steve:
DeleteThx for reading my blog and for the good wishes. I was hoping this blog post would get me out having to buy jewelry, but no such luck :)
Best of luck on your UFE.
Congrats, Mrs. C8j and I will be celebrating 25 years in August, and yes I wonder why she has stood for me this long as well!
ReplyDeleteHey BCM:
DeleteThx and congrats to you and Mrs. C8j. I think we have both made it to 25 because we are so suave and debonair. Ok, would you believe our romantic prose? Ok, I know, it must be Bloggers are hot. Hmm, maybe we are just lucky guys.
BTW: when you write your blog on the day of your 25th anniversary to celebrate your milestone(since I have now set the precedent)a small hint; you may not want to be The Clown Prince of Bloggers for a day, or that 25th anniversary band your wife wants will need a couple more diamonds :)
Congrats to Mr and Mrs BBeancounter! That's an amazing accomplishment and great advice!
ReplyDeleteCheers to the next 25!
Jim
Jim, thx for the good wishes and thanks for your blogging guidance over the last couple years.
DeleteYou have a well rounded perspective on life and appear to be a keen observer of those around you and incorporate what others do well into your life and marriage. So i am sure someday I will be reading your 25th anniversary blog posting.
Congrats mark and family
ReplyDeleteMy 18th is coming up this Sunday. Time sure flies.....
Thx Anon, and congrats on your 18th
DeleteFunny how time flies when looking at the years; but the days sometimes went very slowly, especially when my kids were small. The same repetitive activities that they found exciting but were drudgery for us:)
Congrats Mark, great news to share :)
ReplyDeleteThx Mark, I appreciate it.
DeleteCongratulations. Not easy to love somebody for so long. You have to be really lucky!
ReplyDeleteThx Be*en, yes you do, but not all luck. You have to work at it also.
DeleteCongratulations! On the successful marriage and helpful blog.
ReplyDeleteThx & glad u find the blog helpful.
DeleteHappy belated anniversary wishes! Hope you got an extra pass for a game of golf out of the post.
ReplyDeleteThx Cdn Investor, I was actually allowed to play Sunday to make up for a Sat rain out, so yes :)
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